Obviously, I appreciate the gist of this article, but would like to clarify a few things. I support policies that promote equity including most affirmative action policies. Also, I would NEVER and have NEVER tried to take up a space that was intended for a writer of color. I often see calls for pitches for specific populations I am not a member of and have never once pitched those editors. In this case, I was in the process of hurriedly sending out several pitches for a piece that was pegged to and I wanted to get published before the election. In my haste, I HONESTLY did misread the acronym and did think I was emailing and editor at AAUW and I did think they might be interested in my article for one of their verticals that was not exclusively for women of color. I so understand that my original email looks bad and I wish I'd been more careful with my wording, but that is the truth. I also understand that because the behavior of other white women who've used their privilege to obtain access places not intended for them, I was not given the benefit of the doubt by the editor in question.

I've been accused of having a pattern of racial insensitivity. Like any person who is not shy in expressing her opinion, I've gotten into my share of disagreements on Facebook. I won't apologize for having an opinion but I do apologize for being overly defensive and reactive when my views have been attacked or inaccurate assumptions are made about me. I've shown a lack of maturity and professionalism for not walking away sooner, especially when those disputes involved people of color many of whom are rightfully angry. Because I'm no stranger to trauma, I understand how exhausting it can me to holding up under a collective and ongoing trauma. But because I'm white, I don't understand—can't understand the trauma associated with racial injustices. And that's why I need to practice sitting down shutting up.

I have another pattern that's been ignored in the effort to cancel me. It is a much bigger and longer pattern than the recent insensitivity I've demonstrated on social media. It is a pattern of fighting FOR social justice and for marginalized people communities. The podcast that was cancelled by Critical Frequency Network because of my mistake and subsequent defensiveness was intended to shine a light on environmental racism exercised by our government against farmworkers, most of whom are people of color.

Finally, before you judge my person based on my recent mistakes, please consider reading the article that is at the center of this misunderstanding and cancellation—a cancellation that has resulted not only in loss of income, but threats against me and my family. Here its is: https://medium.com/@amyeroost/modesty-and-other-provocations-2b49f105b2d7

Essays, anthologies, and memoirs, oh my!!

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